Was it me or is it me..
I don't know.. everything happened around me made me angry..
But just don't know how to show it..
Everytime things happened, all I can do is to smile.
Why..
Am i holding back?
Or is it what happened in the past that made me what I am today..
Is it good or bad..
What happened..
Am I a good listener?
Or am I just a rubbish bin that you can throw all our rantings at me?
Am I a good company?
Or am I just a book that you can read and throw away?
Am I a good friend?
Or am I just a person that you can talk to and then forget about me?

Why do I feel the other way..
It hurts..
to not know the truth..
to not know who people treat you..
to not know what people say about you..
to not know how people think about you..

Its sad..
to know that people made used of you..
to know that people left you behind..
to know that you are forgotten..

Its hard..
to find a friend..
to find a person that you can trust..
to find a person that you can confide with..

when you know that..
its not easy to trust a person..

I felt disappointed when..
you all left me alone..
without knowing that I was alone..
and no one even care to find out..

I feel sad when..
friends dont seems to be friends anymore..
you think that I dont care anymore..
you made us disappointed..

There are many many many many things to rant about..
why am i feeling so negative about anything everything..

is it wrong to be nice?
is it wrong to be friendly?
is it wrong to be helpful?
is it wrong?

or maybe I should just..
shut from the world..
and hide in my own shell..

maybe i should stop being helpful..
maybe i should stop being friendly..
maybe i should stop being nice..
maybe i should only care about my own stuff..
maybe...

i shouldnt be there in the first place...